past to present

I found a journal that I started writing in when SJ was first diagnosed with PDD.  I was so upset about the diagnosis that I wanted to get those feelings out.  I was practically a zombie for the first month.  There are not many entries in it.  I thought it was getting a little depressing, so I decided to stop writing in it.  Here is an excerpt from the first entry.

"December 12, 2004:  We received the diagnosis for SJ on November 24th (the day before Thanksgiving).  To say the least, we were both in a fog.  I was partially in denial and I still am hoping for a misdiagnosis.  We both believe he is on the mild end of the spectrum and hope with therapy he will get a lot better.  SJ has been in speech therapy through Early Intervention for a few months now.  That therapy is helping tons.  We are using some sign language, some songs and magnetic pictures.  These methods have helped SJ communicate simple words to us, such as what he wants to eat or drink.  He has been imitating some gestures when we play "When Your Happy and You Know It."  I have also been trying to get SJ to imitate me in the mirror and identify his body parts (eyes, nose, mouth, etc.)."

I get mixed emotions when I looked back at this journal.  I remember feeling so sad that SJ wasn't going to "normal".  I hate that term now.  Who really is normal?  I remember mourning the childhood I thought he lost.  I was wrong.  He didn't lose that childhood.  It just came at a slightly slower pace.  After the fog wore off, I realized that SJ was the same kid that I loved before the diagnosis.  We just had a name for the behaviors now.  He has come so far from that initial diagnosis and that brings me so much joy!  Seven years later, I have a boy that wants to play with others, his brother and his parents.  I have a happy boy with an infectious smile!  It has been a bumpy path to this present, but I wouldn't change a minute of it!