At 8:30, I told him it was time to go. He started to walk down the hall when he realized that he didn't have his binder. I said, "You probably left it in the car. Go out and get it." He walked out to my car, I unlocked it and I watched from the window.
The car door closed and he didn't have his binder. Oh no! I thought. He must have left it at home. I could see the tears rolling down his face. I knew this would through off his whole day. The binders have all their workbooks, homework and folders in them.
"It is not in the car," he said almost inaudibly. "Okay. I will go home and get it," I assured him. I left the school and drove the three miles home. When I got home, I opened the garage door and saw it sitting right by the shoe rack. I grabbed it and drove the three miles back to school.
I ran down to his room and told Mrs. Valentine that I had his binder. He was sobbing uncontrollably. "It is your fault that I forgot it," he said. Mrs. Valentine said quite clearly, "SJ, we talked about this. It is not your mom's fault. It is your responsibility to remember your binder." She thanked me and I told her that I was sorry. I know how much something like this can ruin his day.
That is the thing that I hate about PDD. What may upset a typical child will completely devastate a child on the spectrum. I sent his teacher an email and she told me she had talked again with SJ about his responsibilities. She also said that he did eventually calm down. Thank goodness. I was stressed about his mental state all morning.
At the end of the day, his teacher stopped me in the hall. She wanted to give me a heads up about a bad test score that he received from his reading teacher, Mrs. Dudley. He had scored an F! He got 7/20 and I believe that is the worst grade he has ever gotten. SJ was so upset about the grade that he left his backpack and lunchbox in the room. One of the classmates gave it to me and I thanked Mrs. Valentine for the warning. "I guess he will be crying when I get to the office," I said. "Sorry to be the bearer of bad news," she said.
If I didn't have to get my neighbor kids off the bus, I would have procrastinated on my way to the office. That wasn't an option on that day. When I got near the office, I could hear him crying and I heard his aide talking to him. She was being so calming and reassuring to him. It was lovely to hear. When I walked into the office, he was tear stained and visibly upset. "I got an F, Mom. I am going to be held back," he cried. "No, you are not. It is just one bad test score," I tried to reassure him. I told him and Bob to go to our car and I spoke briefly with his aide.
She told me that he admitted that he hadn't even read the passage. Well, how are you going to answer any questions correctly if you don't read the passage? She suggested that on test days that she could take him out to the 5th grade pod and have him read the passages aloud to her. At least we will know that he read them. I told her that was a great idea and I would check with the teacher. I also thanked her for trying to calm him down.
When I got to the car, SJ was still crying. He kept saying he was going to be held back. "I don't want to do 5th grade another year," he repeated. I told him, "SJ, you are not going to be held back. It is only one test. You missed a lot of questions, because you didn't read the story. Daddy and I will have you read your weekly story to us each night. We will also go over your vocabulary words, so you won't be confused by them."
He cried all the way home. He didn't want the neighbor kids to come down, but it was one of my days to watch them. I told him he could go in his room and shut his door. "I want to talk to Daddy," SJ said. "That is fine. We can call him on the phone," I told him. So, I dialed my husband's number and put SJ on the phone.
He told him all about the binder, the test score and the neighbor kids coming to our house. Then, he handed me the phone. I told my husband what happened and that I would be contacting Mrs. Dudley for some accommodations for SJ.
Again, this is something you don't usually have to deal with when your child is typical. We never have these issues with Bob. So on this day, I hate PDD. I feel it cripples my very bright child. I wish it would go away, but I know that is not realistic. Wouldn't it be great if it could though?
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